Many emotions come naturally once you become a parent: love, affection and a desire to protect. As children grow, venturing into uncharted territories like daycare, school and social events can be hard for some parents. Many feel anxiety about where their kids are, who they're with and what they're doing. Especially during the teen years, irrational parental behavior can actually push kids further away. Although overprotective parents have their child's best interests in mind, trying to control every aspect of a child's life could backfire, causing serious problems for him or her later in life.

Anxiety

Overprotective parents often isolate their children. Perhaps they won't let them play with friends unless carefully supervised. Some parents limit their child's physical activities, for fear they will fall and get hurt. This behavior may protect children physically, but it is also likely to hurt them emotionally. Eventually, your children will encounter dangerous situations in life and without you there, they will lack the necessary skills to cope.

Much of what children learn must come from experience. Children need to fall to know an activity is dangerous and to know they can get up and move on, heal and that they will be okay. They must have disagreements with friends to learn relationship skills. If parents don't let their kids learn these skills, their children will face fear and uncertainty when placed in these situations later in life.

Lack of Self-Confidence

When parents constantly rescue children, they send a harmful message. They tell their children that they are incapable of handling things themselves. Instead of developing self-reliance and feelings of independence, the child develops a sense of being weak and incapable. Children who always have parents to solve their problems will lack self-confidence because they won't have opportunities to practice it. Instead of believing they are smart enough to figure out problems, they will believe they can't be trusted to handle situations without help from others.

Increased Risk-Taking

It is common for teens to rebel against their parents, school or life in general. Teens who grew up with overprotective parents might feel an even stronger need to rebel. This can cause them to take greater risks than those who grew up slowly learning the value of responsibility and the self-confidence that results. If parents always step in to assume responsibility, children grow into teens who act irresponsibly and face ever-more dangerous consequences, such as early pregnancy, drug addiction and jail.

Advice for Parents

If you feel like you might be one of those overprotective parents, take a moment to think. Do you often intervene in your child's life, control most situations or strive to make sure your child is never unhappy? If so, you probably do it because you love your child and can't stand to see her suffer. Remember that never letting your child suffer a little as a child leads to serious suffering as an adult.

Take some steps today to stop these behaviors, to ensure your child will grow into a healthy adult. Step back and allow your child to make his or her own age-appropriate decisions and solve his or her own problems. Offer helpful advice rather than telling your child what to do. You might be surprised at the smart decisions your child makes. Allow them to participate in activities away from home that teach self-confidence, such as outward bound and teen service programs. Although the first few stabs at freedom may not show your child makes good decisions, remember that good decision-making is a skill you teach them, not a task you handle for them. In time, with regular practice, your child will learn to make smarter and safer decisions.

AdventuresCrossCountry.com has seen many teens transform from dependent and fearful children into confidence, self-sufficient young adults through their teen travel and camp programs. While teens still need their parents, they also need to freedom to fail and learn from their mistakes.